Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

Poop

If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

Justin Bieber

Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

what you say to the kid that just hit puberty? your a young man

How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

I touch my sons dick XoXo Wendy.

A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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