My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jeff Oh hey Jeff, come on in

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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Wanna here a funny joke? Will is straight HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hes gay

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

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Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

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You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops