- Anti Joke

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

Two men walk into a bar, get drunk, and drive home. Unfortunately, they crash into a tree and are mortally wounded.

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

Rsoes are geern Voielts are ornage I'm colorbilnd and Dixlesic.

Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

violets are green roses are purple this makes total sense, cheeseburger

Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

Why did the boy ask his dad for a phone? Because he had his head stuck up a sheeps bum