Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

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what do you call a pie in a roll a roll and pie

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Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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So there's this big ass bronco right? It goes to a store and it asks Ben Roethlisberger "Do you know where I can find some girls to rape?" Ben Roethlsiberger says "In aisle 5" so the moose goes down to aisle 5 but there aint no girls!

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

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Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

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What did the Asian say after he had a nightmare? Nothing his nightmare was actually reality and a dishwasher fell on him and killed him.

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Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

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Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops