Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

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theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

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whatt dont w do you call a person with legs that dont work Crippled

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

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The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

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A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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