Why should you be concerned if you see a black midget with no arms and no legs falling off a building? He might get hurt.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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Two bees are flying around a flower. "Hey," says one bee, "you ever think about the meaning of all of this? I mean, isn't there more to life than pollinating and satisfying the Queen?" The other bee replies, "No."

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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a Gay Man Walks Into A Bar And See's its Only Women In There, He Screams And Leaves

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PICKLES

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

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what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? It is unlikely that this situation would occur, as tractors are very large objects and losing one would be very hard, furthermore, tractors are vital agricultural vehicles and most farmers would take care in not misplacing one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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