Teacher: Pop quiz time class. Sally, what year did we first land on the moon? Sally: It was 1969. Teacher: That is correct. Larry, who killed JFK? Larry: What? I didn't do it, I wasn't even born yet! Teacher: Just answer the question Larry: But sir, I swear I would never do that. You have to believe me. Teacher: Larry, you're an idiot

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

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Killing your friend as a joke.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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women rights

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A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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