What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I just found out my wife has cervical cancer."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

Santa isn't real

What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

DERP

What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

KENYAN HEALTHCARE kenyan water kenyan aids-free kenyan we dont have flies around us

Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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