A man wearing a 'What Would Jesus Do' bracelet and a livestrong bracelet goes up to a blind kid and rubs his eyes and the kid can see. The kid was was not used to the bright lights and wandered into traffic, was hit by a car and killed instantly.

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How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

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whats the worst kind of homework? child abuse

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A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

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What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

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how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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How did Chris die? Bush-fire

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roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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