What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

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How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartendor says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife was just diagnosed with cancer and given only a week to live."

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

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Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

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You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops