What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

Jim: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bill: Why? Jim: To get to the other side! Bill: I don't get it Jim: It's an anti-joke, because you expect a punchline but there is no punchline, you get it? Bill: Hold on, let me tickle myself.......oh okay now I get it hahahahaha!

http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

Three men on a journey stop at a farm and ask the farmer if they might be allowed to stay the night. The farmer consents upon one condition: that the visitors not lay a hand on his daughter. The men respected the farmers wishes and left in the morning.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

A man wearing dark sunglasses walks into a convenience store with a dog on a leash. He goes to the middle of the store, and he starts swinging the dog around over his head by the leash. The store clerk comes over and asks, "what are you doing?" The man replies, "Ajiohskdcojqpowuskncvlkzb" Not knowing what else to do, the clerk calls 911. It turns out the man's name is Ruprict, and he has escaped from the local mental institution. A police officer shortly arrives to bring Ruprict back to the hospital.

Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

Doctor Doctor, I keep getting horrible boils all over my face! Okay then. Take off your underwear and we'll see what's going on.

A black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a priest are on plane that is on fire. What do they do? Call their family and tell them they lovedthem, because there are more than likely going to die.

Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

Why was the minority crying? He had something in his eye.

Knock Knock Who's there

Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

How do you get a girl to pay for food? You Rape Her

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

why does osama bin ladens death make me happy? because he was the leader of alkida and created many threats to the u.s. thus the death is ending this creating more freedom. (OSAMA LIKES PENIS!!)

What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

all these jokes are horrible now

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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