What's wet and sticky? I don't know, glue or something.

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I am a mime

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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Howdy stranger.... It is time for you to join! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! Moral: "HEY YOU! STFU! STFU! STFU! STFU!"

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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A man walks into a sofa. BANG

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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A 16 year old girl went into a bar. The police realized she did not have an ID, and arrested her.

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You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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Whats the best things about 25 year olds? Theres 20 of them.

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What do gamer see in his nightmare? a peasant build 4 houses and gets stuck between them.

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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No

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Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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