Yesterday, I was assasinated.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his wife in the hospital. She has terminal cancer.

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A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

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What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? To get his chemotherapy

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What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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3 brothers Mohammed, Ahmed and Saahad were on the 09:25 flight from Tehran to New York. They each only carried a rucksack each and a one way ticket. They are Syrian refugees and their parents are dead.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

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hey im leon and i love the chuckie

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Jake did Why did Isaac cross the road? Because mum told him not to Why did Isaac cross the road? Because Maya was there

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Q: Why was the Asian teacher fired from her job? A: Because she always showed to school too late and to make matters worse the school had recently found out that she was a raging alcoholic.

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How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

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How old are you? 7

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and about not being funny.

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What happened to the couple that got married? They went on their honeymoon.

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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Man walks into a bar, Has a few drinks and goes home.

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I'm not racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

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I wish you were never born. Me too. Then I wouldn't have been raped today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops