What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

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Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? their friend.

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-Doctor! Scientists in California have enough proofs to demonstrate that the Christian religion is false. -Oh my God!

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

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What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

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Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

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Your mother is so fat.

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There's 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and muscular guy. 7 days later, the fat guy receives an invitation to the zoo. It turns he got a new job and his friends was so proud.

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is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops