What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

Why are you on this sight? You're procrastinating. I am too

What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

War horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long film?'

Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

What do you say to a confused blond? You help her with her conundrum.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

What happened to the lady? She queefed.

A Jew, a Catholic, and an Aeithiest walk into a bar. The bartender look at them and says "Is this some kind of a joke?".

Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

Who is a pussy ass bitch and is and has a chode? - Jeff Misner

youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...