Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

Argon walks into a bar. The bartender yells, "Get the hell out!" Argon doesn't react.

how many poeple does it take to change a light bulb? you spelled people wrong.

What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

Q: Why do circles make such good friends? A: They don't. They're shapes and there cannot have friends

How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

Me: Mike Mike: Yeah Me: The more you breath the more pissed off im getting.

whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

69

Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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