Why did Todd have intimacy problems? He was molested as a child.

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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i hate when mothers said " clean your room" me " why " mom " because we have guest coming " me " oh i am sorry i didn't know we are all gathering in my f**king room

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21

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Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

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What's a stupid joke on anti-joke? One that involves a random number with absolutely no meaning

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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42

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I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

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Your mom is so poor She will soon have to make the difficult decision whether or not to put you up for adoption

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numbers just make the funniest antijokes

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why did susy fall off the swing? Cause she has no arms knock knock Who's there? not susy

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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A lion and a cheetah raced each other and the cheetah won Lion: "man you're a cheetah!" Cheetah: "no you're lion!" Then the cheetah tears off the lions head and feeds it to their babies

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What do you call a white man sitting between two black men on a bus? A group of three people having a friendly conversation about the upcoming football season.

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What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

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Wow, fuzzy feelings, you just made my top 10.000 friends list. Jk, you my favorite girl right now, I mean my wife is always my favorite, but the kind of love I feel for you, is a completely different kind of love, I consider it the sum of who you are, and I cant say I love you the same, because it is a completely different feeling. Wow, I cant believe I am typing this on horsehead network, by the way Red, you better get out of here, or I am going to have to shut your operations down, sorry for getting serious in the middle of this, but we can meet and be friends, if you promise to take good care of my new friend (you), but getting out of this site, you and your crew. So, sex whenver you feel like and friends for life? How does that sound? I prefer long term agreements.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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