The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

As they went down the hill Jack tripped on a rock, falling breaking many bones including his neck. In all the hysteria, Jill fell too, however she landed on a rock and now has severe dementia. This was all for a pail of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

the lemon was sweet.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock Knock. Who's there? A little boy who can't reach the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a blue whale? A: About 10 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

whats worse than worldwarII world war iii

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

thumb_up thumb_down +24

When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops