What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

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What happen to the man who got drunk and passed out behind the wheel? He crashed into a tree, his car caught fire and then he got incinerated.

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Tucker Rivera

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

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what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

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A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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This is an anti-joke.

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Penis

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why didnt the man go to the wedding? he wasnt invited.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

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How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

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Knock knock Whos there You spelt who's incorrectly You spelt whos incorrectly who ...................

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

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What did God say to the priest while he was masturbating.... ... God doesn't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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