Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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Perverted man: Nice bum where u from Hot ladie with the nice bum: Boston Mass so kiss my ASS

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what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

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Why are you so gay? Because I am a homosexual.

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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WHATS A CRUM AND LIVES IN A SLUM ?? A BOY CALLED KEVIN CRUMMY

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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A frog jumped on the lilly pad, it sank and drown and all of the tadpoles didn't have a mother and inevitably died

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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