Why did the Black man kill the White man? So he could end up in jail with the rest of his family.

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

live or die you decide to late time to die

What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

What do you call 4 Mexicans at the bottom of the ocean? Cuatro sinco.

Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken -A black guy being black

A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

Do you know what has always angered me about people not choosing to control their own lives Nero?

Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

Yo momma so fat she soon became aware of her physical state and developed an eating disorder which led to her tragic death.

Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A comment saying "I don't think that's an anti-joke"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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