What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

Q: Why Cant The T-Rex Clap? A: No, Its Not Because His arms are to short, Its because he's Dead You Idiot...

The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

will you like this joke my sources say no

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

find the o 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duh its up top

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

How many finger does a normal person have? 8...and 2 thumbs!!

roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

Why couldn't the fan turn on? Because it was broken.

What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

What do we call Osama? Osama

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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