Which of the following is the biggest? A. 7 B. 17 C. 71 D. Yo mama

I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

What? Huh?

Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

Q. Why did the car break dance? A. I dont know!

A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

Q: Why is eminem such a good rapper? A: well if you want to know its becuase he had a bad childhood experience and and needed some money so he put hard work and dedication into rapping.

What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

Two ladies are walking down a road. One says, "It's freezing out here!" and then the other woman, who is a scientist, says "No it's not freezing. The freezing point of oxygen is -365.82 degrees F. So, unless it is actually that temperature outdoors, I highly doubt that it is freezing outside."

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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