Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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what was postman pat's name before he was a postman? Pat.

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

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Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

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What is the worst joke ever? This one.

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What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in an apple within a worm inside your apple...

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What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

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Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

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Whats funnier then a dead baby a dead baby dressed as a clown

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A mother had three kids: 1st kid- “Mom, why did you name me Daisy?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a daisy fell on your head.” 2nd kid- “Mommy, why did you name me Rose?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a rose fell on your head.” 3rd kid- “Blahblahblahflismdjsk” *makes retarded noises* Mom- “SHUT UP BRICK!”

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A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

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Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

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Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

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what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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