What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

Why did the woman cross the road? Why the hell is she out of the kitchen!

Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

Your mom is so fat that I worry she may develop diabetes.

A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

What do you call a woman that is on her period? -A girl that is expirencing a difficult to control flow of blood through the clitorus.

When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

What color was the black guy's skin? Brown

Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

Why is Obama Care a lie? Cuz he doesn't care!

How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

Why could a fat man not do a barrel roll? He has already to many rolls.

What the person say to the other Person? Hi.

why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

Two men are talking: Bob: "Do you like fishsticks?" Joe: "Yes I do." Bob: "Your a gay fish."

What do you get when Johnson cooks toast? Shit toast.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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