A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Jake. Walsh.

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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hi hi stop! no yes no no stop no grr lol i will get you back not if i fool grrrrrrr BOOM BOOMBOTH:GRRR BOOM BOOM lol lol both:grrrr THE END BY STICK SMOKER

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: A bush, have you ever been dragged through one? It hurts.

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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How did the plumber fix the leaky faucet? Trick question. The plumber is actually an iguana.

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whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

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Stat1st1cs sh0w 0ne 1n f1ve pe0ple d0n't understand b1nary

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A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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How do I make my penis 12 inches? Tug on it.

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Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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