roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

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A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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A duck walks into a bar. Then he walks out.

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How do you keep black people out of your backyard. A no trespassing sign.

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denisssssssssssssss

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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phil - "honey, why is the picture quality so bad" Phil was watching a toaster

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I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch some water , jill ended up bending over and jack ended up touching a blue waffle

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What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

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What's worse then AIDS? Chad Wolbert

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What would Chuck Norris do if you insulted him? Nothing. He probably doesn't have time for such foolishness.

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A girl and her family were walking by a cliff. Suddenly - due to a a part of the cliff falling away - her family fell over the edge and died. The girl ran to the bottom of the cliff and saw her family's body's strewn across the rocks, blood everywhere. She didn't have a phone on her and so could not call the police. She called over a man she saw in the distance. He asked "What's happened?". Just managing to stammer the words through her tears she said "My entire family fell off a cliff and died". The man unzipped his trousers and said "This really isn't your day is it love?"

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Why did the Iraqi airline crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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