Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

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Q: Why could John say goodbye to his girlfriend ? A: He didnt have one

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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knock knock whose there tim tim who just kidding its fred

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What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Laugh at him

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What is the difference between a snail and whale? A loaf of bread

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Getting all F's on your report card isnt that bad.... I mean you could go home to find your whole family murdered and your Girlfriend hanging from a noose.

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why did the fish get flushed down the drain? because it was dead

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When Miley Cyrus sticks out her tongue, people usually are there to take a photograph.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face" To which the horse replies by trampling him to death for making rude remarks about his face.

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One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: You tell her an anti joke

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Roses are red. Violets are blue... Hold on. Roses could be white too.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Well, that depends if the apocalypse was happening and if there were even any Americans left at all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops