Joker: Knock knock Batman: Who's there Joker: Not your parents

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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What's white and horny? a unicorn.

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A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

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Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

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whats black and strange a paki

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

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What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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