What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

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what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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