Q: How could the black man afford to buy a TV? A: He had a well-paying job and a supporting family.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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How do black guys say hi to each other? Hi.

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

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Alright then, call me sometime then.

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Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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why didnt the man go to the wedding? he wasnt invited.

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Not gonna tell you, that was one weird story, I feel like super high right now.

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Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

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How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

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What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

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Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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A knock knock B who's there A nobody

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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