Ding dong Who's there Electricity

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why did the Chinese guy take steroids? He didn't he's naturally small.

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

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How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

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How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

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What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

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What's love like? Some people say it's like a lotus flower, others say it's like an orchid... Personally I'd like to say it's like a fire at the bottom of you're soul-- like when people sin and go to hell... that fire burns forever???

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Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

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Women's Rights

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What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

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what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

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:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

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My mom says to me are you gay and i say are you gay (What did i just do)

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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