Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

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I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

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Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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A man was complaining about not getting enough sleep. He was then raped.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

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What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

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What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

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anti jokes are really funny

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What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Why didn't the magician pull a rabbit from a hat? Despite his choice of occupation, magic tricks are rarely appropriate in hostage situations.

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What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

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Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

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How do you kill Helen Keller? With a gun.

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How does a man with no legs cross a road? In his wheelchair.

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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