What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

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an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

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why couldn't the tree grow? Because I cut it down with a chainsaw

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What did the crowd do when a lion walked into the bar? Got up and left because they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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(PC) What did the homosexual man say when accidently sat on a stick? Ouch.

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what do you call a woman with cancer wearing a wedding dress? a shouttellcock

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Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

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What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

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If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

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Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

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2 gays monkeys walk into a bar.........

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

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I was on Facebook today. Opened someones wall. Read "LIKE if you know someone that needs to be smacked in the face with a shovel." So I liked it and wrote my exboyfriend's name.......

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What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

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why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

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What do you call a black man that works in a church A priest

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whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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