How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Why was the boy drinking toilet water? Because he was receiving a violent swirly. He then went home and killed himself.

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A giant meteor will hit the earth tomorrow.What do you do? Tell everyone I told you so.

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A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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Why can't you look at the sun? Because it's 2.00 AM

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How you know when dislextic

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mitchell palmer sucks

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How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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how many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? 2 one to hold the latter and one to put it in

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What the difference between an apple and a pear One of them is red

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My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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why did you poop because you are a poop

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A man falls off a building and dies on Impact

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And the guy who played Trapper John on MASH wins the coveted 'Last Famous TV Person to Die in 2015' award!!! Woooooooo!!!!

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A white, black, jewish, and hispanic person apply for a job as an accountant who gets the job? One of them.

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a rabbit? A dead rabbit...

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Erron, who the hell do you work for? I thought we where friends, allies! We have not done anything illegal ever!

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops