What do black people and tables have in common? Nothing.

What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Why was 2 afraid of 81? Because seven eight nine.

One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

why did the chinese man die because someone shot him

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

Edward Smith had started telling a long rambling joke when William McMaster Murdoch cut him off with "I don't like where this is headed".

RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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