Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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What happens if you an 3ft size olive, a glob of red paint and rainbow colored glue on a table and rub your arm in it? You get olive, red paint and glue on your arm.

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What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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A Mexican, a Jew, an American and an Indian are on a plane with no parachutes. No one jumps out because no one has a parachute.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

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If chuck Norris is so awesome how come he's not at my house slamming my face into the keybodhdtegdudgegdtdjaowpqhwvsmx vxbdnsksksh

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

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the boy fell, because he hit a bump.

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Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

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A French man gets into a fight

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What is worst then a blond trying to pass collage?....... There is nothin wrong with that

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Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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Why do i have no likes? Because im disliked...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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