A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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What did the dog say when the tiger bit him? Nothing. Dogs don't talk.

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

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I'm 23, just like most people my age.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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what good about eatting every night knowing that a african want

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

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What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

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why do we have school? 2 learn duh y r u even askin? ur STOOPIDE!

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i don't hate you because your fat ...your fat because i hate you

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Me - "Wanna hear something that will make me laugh?" *giggles* friend - "Sure." teehee if anyone gets it.

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

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What do you call 1 + 1 = 2? i like boobs

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A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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