Why is my lawn red? Because i forgot to tell my neighbor's children to move

Knock Knock Whose there? I have a gun and candy, get in the van

What's funnier than the holocaust? Nothing.

Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

What did the hooker get for Christmas ? AIDS.

Why did the Olympic gold-medalist lose his faith in God? Because he began to feel that the the reasoning that most religions were based on was fairly spurious.

What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

what's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings what's worse than 2 bee stings? the Holocaust. what's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings

why did the african american man get shot? he partook in a gang life

What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

j

chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

What did lil' Bobby get for christmas? Cancer.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's Supe- oh wait it is a plane

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...