why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

who else is on here?

Knock Knock F*ck of I'm watching p0rn

Bad grammers.

whats black and doesnt work? a broken black toaster

A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

I agree Detroit sux. But the bulls suk too ya know

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

What's brown and sticky? A stick. But if you answered poop you aren't wrong.

whats worse than being payton johnson being black

What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

Wanna hear something dirty? Mud.

"Is this the Krusty Krab?" "Yes it is, how may I help you?"

How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

19 roosters walk into a roller coaster

*prepares this to get negative votes*

Why did the first monkey fall off the tree? becuase he died Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? because he was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall off the tree? monkey see, monkey do

How do you know when a ghost is lying? I don't know because I've never met one, so from personal experience I couldn't tell you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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