What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

What did the vegitarian order for brunch. VEGITARIANS DONT BELIEVE IN ICE CREAM>

What do you call a person with no eyes, ears, or mouth? Helen Keller

Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

so...um, yeah

what do you call a man without an umbrella? wet

Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

Q: What does Chinese look like? A:Chinese

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

There once was a man from Nantucket. He had no distinguishing characteristics whatsoever.

how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

Why do men not get cullulite? Because it's ugly.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And I hate Jewish people

Tommy got neutered.

What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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