i have a christmas tree.

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

How do you make a professional gamer cry? You burn his house down.

A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

Why did the black cop pull the white guy over? He was going approximately 52 miles per hour on a 40 miles per hour speed limited road.

What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

Anne Widdecombe becomes attractive.

what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

time to spruce up!

Roses are red. Violets are blue. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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