Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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nock nock who's there? bob bob who? bob franklin let me in 'cause i'm freezing!

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what the difference between ET and polish people? ET is an alien and polish people are human

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roses are black violets are black I'm blind i need a dog.

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A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

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A black man walks into a convienent store, pays for his stuff and leaves

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a train? Because she was blind, deaf, and most likely uneducated in the field of train conduction.

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Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

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Girls get fucked Boys fuck Gays puke

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How many chinese women can you fit in a car? About the same amount as men.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

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Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

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chirs

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I'm sorry sally your grandmother is dead. LOL _ grandpa Laugh out loud!. I can't belive you. I thought it meant lots of love Grandpa-ha funny mistake though right?

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This is not a joke

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Q. Knock Knock A. Whose there? Q. how am i supposed to know why don't you answer it and find out you dumb ass! gosh.... people and their common sense these days!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops