How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

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Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

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Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: He wasn't, it turns out 7 was afraid of 6 because 6 beat 7 up in high school

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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Prostate exam > Some of these Anti Jokes

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

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Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

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Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

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You know what they say... Big feet Lawn-mower

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why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He was butchered on the farm for chicken fingers.

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What did the man want for his birthday? Chicken dinner serves 2-3 people

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

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Wolfjob.

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Your mother is so classy, when I asked her to order at a fast food drive through she decided to park the car a eat inside.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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