How did the little boy get down from the top of the empire state building... He took the elevator

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

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Why did the heroin addict get staff infection? His skin broke open multiple times without proper cleansing.

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SHE GOT A BIG BOOTY SO I CALL HER by her real name because she is a woman and worthy of my respect.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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on a scale from a banana to a pound coin - how much do you like the works of antonio vivaldi?

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A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

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Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

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What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

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Knock knock. ... There was no reply because the resident was on holiday.

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who dosent like to wear shirts and is not straight Petko Manchev

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what did the ghost say to the bee boo-bee

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How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cargo. Cargo who? Cargo beep beep.

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how many babies does it take to fill up a blender? None. they all died before being put in a blender.

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

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I wrote a funny joke.

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A mormon walks into a bar.

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whats a great gift to share with small children? Ebola

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops