How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

your mothers smells so bad,because she has poor hygiene skills

What's better than a gold brick? 2 gold bricks.

how do you make a little girl cry?? Kill her family

how many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 283,000,322,249,390

How does shit taste?\ Good.

Whats the difference between Tina Turner and dead babies? I have never fu*ked Tina Turner before.

Why did the young boy drop his ice cream? Subscribe to find out; starting at only $14.99 a month! For more jokes similar to this one, subscribe to "Horrible Jokes" for $95 a month! Subscription Plans: - $14.99: Answer one joke per month - $49.99: The above plan... PLUS a free copy of "Antijoke, the book" - $99.99: A free cookie - $1099.99: A free cookie and a pass to the dark side - $0.25: Eternal happiness Order now for best prices! Or else we'll burn down your house and kill your extended family! Thank you!

David: Hey Bill. Do you know what the most common place for a Democrat to work is? Bill: No. David: An insane Asylum, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a black person to work is? Bill: No. David: A prison, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a 20th centrury undercover German Jew to work is? Bill: No. David: A morge, so they can be with their friends and family. David: Do you know what the most common place for a Scientologist to work is? Bill: No. David: With Democrats. (Writen by Ben, avid Anti-Scienctologist)

what do you call a kid in a wheelchair? . handicapped.

A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

who is 2 chainz? no one 2 chains is just 2 chains. spelled with an "s" not a "z"

A white man and a black woman walk into a bar, they both fell in love and lived happily together until their 25 year old son had gotten in too a car crash Luckily their son lived

Why was the black man killed? He committed a serious crime and was issued the death penalty.

Doctor: I bring grave news. Your wife is dying. She won't survive for another 100 years. Concerned and anguished Husband: Oh... that's ok! Doctor: Oh did I say years? I meant days! Oh the mirth! *The doctor breaks down into hysterical laughter, which the Concerned and Anguished Husband is furious to see, as the Doctor is taking delight out of such a grave situation.

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

Uber Driver: "Hey I'm close, where are you?" Me: "oh, I see you!" Uber Driver: "Are you that guy in the middle of the road?" Me: "yeah, floor it"

What's the difference between a cheeseburger and a dead baby............I don't j!zz on the cheeseburger before I eat it.

Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

Your mom is so old, I am surprised she can still own a house and function on her own.

John: Spell IT Mike: Q-U-A-D-R-A-M-E-C-H-A-N-I-C-S

When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...