roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

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why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

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What did the dog say when the tiger bit him? Nothing. Dogs don't talk.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its body.

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Yo momma's so fat she got her own zip code! except she doesn't because zip codes are reserved for much larger areas than that of your mother.

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How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

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Q: Why did the officer stop the black SUV? A: Because it was going way over the speed limit.

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Yo momma's so fat that her weight is completely disproportional to the average weight of someone her age.

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Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

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How do you know if there is a monster under your bed? Monsters are mythical creatures that, even if they were real, would be unlikely to sleep under a child-sized bed.

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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How many fingers do most people have? 10

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what is worse than a joke? an anti-joke.

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All this fuss about drink driving is a load of crap! I frequently drink and drive, and I've never had an accident, apart from one small collision in which my wife was paralysed from the neck down.

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YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

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Zafarfanugen the third: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bob: Who cares about some dumb chicken crossing the road! I am more interested in why three generations of your family would continually use such a ridiculous name!

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Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

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What is an anti joke? It's jokes about jews, blacks, and walking out of bars LIKE AN IRISHMAN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops