Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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Life gave me onions. Onionaide Sucks

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Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

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What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

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Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

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When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

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What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

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What's the biggest difference between white and black people? the melanin levels in their skin.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Why did Jake fall off his bike? His mom threw a fridge at him.

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Womens rights

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

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Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

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What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

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What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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