Q: What did the pedestrian say to the bus driver that hit him? A: Nothing, he died.

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What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm sorry I don't know you but I think I might have run over your dog!

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what is the diference between a jew and a boy scout. a boy scout comes home from camp.

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What's hiding in Redfoo (from LMFAO)'s afro? Nobody knows...

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Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

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Why wasn't the crow allowed on the plane? He had too much carrion luggage

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What do you call a black man driving a helicopter? Blackhawk down

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What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

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Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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In 1843 when Man invented the moon, people set sail on ironclad ships to lands that sold items that weren't for sale in similar such stores in other lands not reachable by ironclad ships or dirigibles as they became known once they changed form completely and were a differentobject entirely and of no use for water transport. That's when the real revolution in telecommunications began, the truck drivers would use CB radios as early as 1287 and 1276 in Canada. the CB radio enabled the users to order pizza and develop symbiotic relationshiops with canvas. Amongst other things.

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What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

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1 111111 1 1 11111111111 1 1 111111 1

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Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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It sucks if you have amnesia. It sucks if you have amnesia.

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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"knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The SS, we heard you are smuggling jews in your attic, so you are coming with us."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops