Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

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FUS RO DAH!!!

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89 bottles of beer on the wall, 89 bottles of beer, if one alcoholic passes the wall, 0 bottles of beer on the wall!

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Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

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Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

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So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

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You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

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What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

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Q: How do you break into your own house? A:You don't....thats ridiculous(:

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What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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So I was walking down the road today

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What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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